Knowing when to wait
On asking for what you want
“If you don't get what you want, it's a sign either that you did not seriously want it, or that you tried to bargain over the price.”
Rudyard Kipling
Recently, I got a new fridge. This was a very easy process. All I had to do was email my landlord stating my reasons for wanting a new fridge. And then two days later, I was wiggling my schedule around so that I could be home during the expected delivery window.
Truly, my old fridge was ruining my life. I was barely sleeping at night because of the noises it would make every couple of hours. I had just enough energy to work for 8 hours each day, and that was it. After tolerating this for over three months, I could take it no more, so I finally asked my landlord for a new one.
I think the lesson here is quite simple— sometimes, you just need to ask for what you want.
I often find myself thinking that asking for what you want is a rookie move. Just stating your desire is too small a price to pay for what you actually want. And when all you can offer are your words, this feels like a foolish way to begin a transaction. Instead, you might be better off holding off on making that request and using that time to preemptively address all the ways you might be denied.
Preparing well before you ask for a favor is a generally smart move, but I err on the side of over-preparation— certainly in the case with my fridge. On one hand, I don’t know if my landlord would have been so quick to oblige my request a week after moving in, and I also suspect establishing my reputation as a tenant over the past couple of months may have helped. But on the other hand, three months is a long time to deal with poor sleep.
Anyway, this new fridge is great— stainless steel and whisper-quiet, I can finally have a good night’s rest now. I can’t believe I waited so long to ask for it.